@AnkCoupleTO: I tattooed the word "WINNER" on my forehead in case I meet anyone new and they have any doubts
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@lawking30: Making NSA work hard today: just left vm for Senator saying, "drop-off done" & then made a hair appointment at a salon in Lahore, Pakistan.
@ericsshadow: ME: these gummy bears are delicious WIFE: those are daily vitamins ME: *holding the couch over my head with one arm* I can't find the remote
@Parentpains: Sometimes in life you have to give the people around you a little push, into traffic.
@Sean_Burgundy_: There's nothing worse than when you tell someone it's a long story and they reply with "I have time."