@FilthyRichmond: I taught the kids to sign my name on report cards and detention slips because a good parent knows how to delegate responsibility.
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@storming01: The secret to enjoying good wine: Open to let it breathe. If it appears not to be breathing, apply mouth to mouth.
@nicfit75: Neighbors having their yearly Xmas party. Not invited again. So don't tell me the screaming drunken outdoor fights don't pay off.
@Reel2Dialog2: The Lion King is my favorite movie about how having a karate wielding monkey can completely change your life.
@kwirkyKerri: Drops empty vodka bottles in all the neighbor's recycling bins. So the garbage men don't think it's just me.