@Alex_N_Chains: I think at this point, a pterodactyl egg has better odds of getting laid than I do.
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@Mostly_Cheese: Me: *watches six consecutive hours of SVU* Also me (brushing teeth for two minutes twice a day): Thith ith bullthit.
@kyle_thatisall: Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"
@moose_chocolate: Autocorrect changed "you're so wise" to "you're so wide", and now I need to find a good hiding spot before my wife comes home.