@ShaunRightNow: I think God created marriage so death wouldn't come as such a disappointment.
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@River_Niles: Today I found out my nephew is scared of the vacuum.. Today I also found out I have a very dark cruel evil side to me..
@katiefzack: Whenever I order room service and the person tells me how long until the food arrives, I whisper, "If I'm alive by then," and hang up.
@horsedetective: Horse detective stood in the rain and looked out to sea. He thought about justice and fate. He thought about her. He thought about apples.
@RickAaron: I had a fountain drink at the mall today. All those pennies make the water taste terrible.