@HotlinkStrahota: I think I'm gonna make a bracelet that supports getting rid of bracelets that support stuff.
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@weinerdog4life: No, your baby was definitely crying before I dropped it, that's why I dropped it.
@TrainedHedonist: We're out of duct tape, craft glue, and frozen orange juice because I made a sandwich while I was drunk last night.
@JennyJohnsonHi5: My mom asked me a question and when I went to answer she said, "Hold on I can't hear you. I gotta turn on the light." The dark was too loud?