@CaucasianJames: i think it’s time i give cats another chance. if any cats are reading this i just wanna say sorry for wanting to send u all to the military (even tho i still think it’s a good idea since u all have 9 lives) and i’m willing to start over if u are
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@amydillon: Back-to-school tip for parents: while not explicitly forbidden, it is frowned upon to spray champagne on the hood of a departing school bus.
@emmaberen: with absolutely zero exaggeration I think I can say that this is the funniest thing I have ever seen
@david8hughes: I lost my job because my manager heard me slapping one of the customers. He wasn't even at work. He heard from home.
@sixthformpoet: People who ask themselves what Jesus would do seem to forget just how badly things worked out for him.