@WoodyLuvsCoffee: I think my nephew finally figured out that there's no chameleon in this cage & that his Xmas present is a cage.
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@The_MartiniGirl: The sampler tester at the liquor store told me to stop coming back every hour in a disguise.
@onion_an: Gf: Remember that night we had unprotected sex Me: Yeah Gf: I'm having twins Me suspiciously: We only did it once why's there two babies
@RastaHipsta: Mission Impossible? He's done four of them now. Let's call it "Mission Pretty Hard but Ultimately Doable"