@KimmyMonte: I think the first person to see a pug was like wait why is that sweet potato snorting?
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@thenoahkinsey: If you didn't wanna hear "Baby smell is biology preventing the mom from eating it," you shouldn't have invited me to the baby shower, Carol!
@robyn_vo: I can't believe I gave him my whole heart and he just shit on it like it was nothing, I hate mennnnever mind, he texted back. False alarm.