@Shock_Monster: I think the guy in front of me is trying to resolve the world's economic issues single handedly at this ATM.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@iamspacegirl: autocorrect: Tim! me: No no, autocorrect, this is TOM we know him. autocorrect*growling*: Tim. me *spritzing phone with water*: NO.
@FlyJ_: I have 1 calorie left for the day on MyFitnessPal app. I think I’ll eat this fruit fly that’s been annoying me.
@panmidwest: [BAR] Me: What do you recommend? Barkeep: Moscow Mule, Mojito, Old Fashi- M: [Puts finger to his lips] which tastes the most like Capri-sun?
@TheRolo: I ran out of coffee this morning, beer seemed like an acceptable replacement. Everyone is so pretty today.