@Dschnoeb: I think the only girl I know that hasn't said "you're like a brother to me" is my sister.
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@weinerdog4life: A good way to make friends is to crawl under the bathroom stall quickly before they can get away
@tyleroakley: The 11th commandment was, "Talk shit, get hit" but God totally didn't have enough room on those stone things, so, like, yeah.
@abbycohenwl: "Where do people already feel awkward & uncomfortable?" "Church?" "K let's make 'em like that" -- funeral home designers