@Somerandomhonky: I think we should hear adeles boyfriends songs before we pick sides.
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@DrDogMD: NURSE: I promise. It's ok. You can come in. MAILMAN (trembling): are..are you sure DR DOG: *locked in his office just going freakin nuts*
@d_duhwit: Wife*comes home*: What's that noise? Me: U said to give Tim an anvil Wife: ADVIL! He should be in bed Me: but..he's almost finished my sword
@TheBoydP: Me: Show me a pan that didn't get clean the first time and I will show you a pan that needs to soak.. Wife: STOP TWEETING AND WASH THE PAN!
@simoncholland: One good thing about having kids is that they are sick every time I get invited to something I don't want to do.