@Fruit_Slinger: I think weed is messing with my memory. I can't remember shit anymore! I think it's because weed is messing with my memory.
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@CoopSoSarc: Hitting on women at this PTA meeting would probably be easier if I actually had a kid at this school.
@Breadery: Brain: Walk up to her and offer her a drink. Me: I WANT TO DRINK YOU LIKE A SIPPY CUP. Brain: Can you actually hear me?