@BoozieEyedJoe: I thought I stepped on a Lego, but thankfully, it was just a rusty old nail.
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@zachreinert03: When my roommate won't wash the dishes I always leave a note'hey please do the dishes, because I will wash one knife & use it in your sleep'
@djdarrellripley: Her: My father is very upset that I'm your girlfriend. Me: Well, duh, I'm very upset that you're my girlfriend...
@Rockenden: I can't love you. I'm still in love with a girl I saw in a toothpaste ad 15 yrs ago. She winced when she ate ice cream, I can't abandon her.
@Xoolun: Step 1 Change your wifi password to blowmefirst. Step 2 Wait for someone to ask for your wifi password.