@BoozieEyedJoe: I thought I stepped on a Lego, but thankfully, it was just a rusty old nail.
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@thenatewolf: Using Instagram as my only data set, I estimate my friend’s food budget to be about $78,000 a year.
@JoParkerBear: Texting while driving is incredibly stupid and dangerous. You're practically begging for typos.
@jessokfine: Witches these days have it so easy. Do you know how hard it used to be to find so many newts? Now you get them with free 2 day shipping.