@Pmerrily: I thought kegels were like Jewish bagels...boy was I wrong
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@BuckyIsotope: Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch an ounce of ganja Jack lit up and took a puff And Jill cuffed him. She was DEA. Jack died in prison.
@electrolemon: a cute girl stopped behind my laptop as I was full screen on a pic of bread and I didn't know what to say so I stammered out "I like bread"
@Donnie_Fairburn: [Comes home and wife is laying in bed with Another Man] "Hey" Hi "Can I ask you something?" Yup "Why'd you name the dog 'Another Man' babe?"
@titletown__: It's so obvious that she wants me. She avoids me at all costs probably because her feelings are so strong for me. Yeah, I'll go with that.