@Izianikapani: I threw a boomerang yesterday and it didn't come back. How long do you reckon before it's safe to turn around?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@geowizzacist: (Face painter at kid's birthday party): ...and what shall I paint on your face? Me: Enthusiasm.
@dafloydsta: Not to brag, but I always go to the hottest cashier at the store and she always checks me out.
@InternetHippo: [hell] Satan: Everybody get online & read stuff that makes you mad for eternity Guy next to me: Nooooo Me: I trained my whole life for this
@goldengateblond: Anyone who says cheetahs are the fastest land mammals hasn't seen me move a cat off an expensive area rug before he pukes.