@Samzen_: I throw my poop to birds to give them a taste of the parallel universe.
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@jonnysun: DAD: wat am i chopped liver CHOPPED LIVER: [in this joke imagine choped liver is a sentiemt being] wat the hell is that suposed to mean phil
@SharpeBytes: It's so cute how you think wearing that cross around your neck exempts you from being a reasonable human being
@Playing_Dad: [On a date] *Don't let her know you're a dog* Girl: Do you want to...maybe go for a walk after this? *starts running in circles going crazy*