@RamblingMachine: I told my BF I dreamt he got me a ring for my birthday. Later, I found a wrapped box from him, with a book entitled "the meaning of dreams".
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ElgatoEsmio: SOME DUDE IN A LAB IS WORKING ON BRINGING THE PTERODACTYL BACK TO LIFE SO ENJOY THOSE EVENING STROLLS WHILE YOU CAN!
@withanewname: [Installing ceiling fan] Me: drill…screwdriver… tape…there finished! Wife on the phone: Is this Bob's fix-it shop? Yeah, he just got done.
@SortaBad: Me: goodnight moon Moon: It's 6pm Me: I know but I'm tired Moon: I literally just got here
@robdelaney: Reminder: Please just hit the "RT" button on my tweets if you're ugly. Don't want people associating your busted face with my art.