@LaziestCanine: I told my crush I liked them through a Spotify playlist
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KalvinMacleod: ME: I can’t find my sandals WIFE: did you look everywhere? ME: yes WIFE: even down ME: yes even dow—I did not put those on
@Dawn_M_: People say eye contact is important when flirting, but when I put my finger in someone's eye they never seem to like it.
@tragecies: Biden: What if we paint the Mexican flag in the office Obama: Joe, no Biden: I already ordered the paint Obama: Joe
@ventivodkacran: When someone yells "STOP!" I never know if it's Hammertime or if I should collaborate and listen.