@H0TMessBarbie: I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places. He said I should prolly not go to those places anymore.
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@SteveKoehler22: For fun, the next time you have an attractive waitress- Order a "quickie" then act surprised when she tells you it's pronounced "quiche"
@Robert_Beau: My boss accused me of sticking my finger in his BD cake in the break room fridge, but he is completely wrong, it wasn't my finger.
@vladchoc: Dance like no one's a werewolf. Eat like you found it in the couch. Shout like your cat's sleeping. Feel good like a bossy poem told you to.
@redpawn3: One of My Ex's was absolutely beautiful. But, it didn't workout because all she wanted to do was SWING. I miss third grade.