@JaymayAllDay: I told my friends I found my Lasik surgeon on Yelp and they were horrified. Or interested, I'm not sure, I can't make out faces so well.
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@13spencer: Relationship advice: Find someone who likes (or dislikes) the same amount of air-conditioning as you, and stick with them.
@DurtMcHurtt: The guy I cheat off moved seats before today's spelling test, like he's teaching me some kind of lessen.
@abhorrent_wife: Please, baseball fans. Enthrall me with complex details about a game where someone hits the ball with a stick and runs around in a circle.