@Brianhopecomedy: I told my Mom that I was going to the Apple store and she said, "You sound like you're 4 - it's the grocery store".
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@MommaUnfiltered: My daughter asked me if I know how to do the Running Man, like my generation didn't invent it. Anyway, that's what brings me to the ER.
@Fred_Delicious: "so doc... am I dying?" "we're all dying, just at different speeds" "but what about me" "You're like, the Usain Bolt of dying dude lmao"
@DeanScott01: Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every six months about it.