@KyleMcDowell86: I told my waiter the same thing i told my plastic surgeon. Give me chicken breasts.
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@adamhess1: I just bumped into my old headmistress who said how weird it is to see me all grown up now. Surely it would be weirder if I was still 9.
@FatherWithTwins: Someone cut in front of me in the salad bar line today. I didn't do anything because anyone who wants a salad that badly terrifies me.