@lisaxy424: I told this cashier she kinda looked like Lorde, and as I was walking out, heard the lady behind me assure her she did not look like Jesus.
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@miliondollameat: me: wow the stars are beautiful gf: omg babe they really are me: u know who else is beautiful? gf: *blushes* who? :3 me: Harambe
@MyMomologue: Bedtime: Brush teeth Put on pjs Read Turn off light Put them back in bed Put them back in bed Threaten everything they love Put them back
@lasergirl70: I'm pretty sure I made one of those "If we're both still single" pacts with someone. I just wish I'd written down his name.
@Femi_17: Can I call you? Crush: Yes Errm, I called but you didn't pick Crush: I said you could call, I never said I'd pick up