@huntigula: I, too, am shocked Ted Cruz has had sex. I just assumed his kids were born when he ate after midnight and got wet like in the movie Gremlins
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@AristotlesNZ: Guy stole my bike so I got in a cab & said follow that guy! He said sure, whats his twitter name? We laughed & hi-fived & I need a new bike
@ninjadinosaur1: If I had a twin, whenever someone asked which one of us was older, I'd tell them that we both came out at the exact same time.