@caseytduncan: I traced the call. It was phone-shaped.
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@IcyAndSpicy: Saw a tweet about foods to help your sex life. I need sex to help my sex life, not food.
@doktorj: Enhanced interrogation idea: If waterboarding isn't working, try having my mother brush their hair.
@BigHeb7: If your best clothes proudly advertise Monster Energy Drink, you can't be left alone with your best looking cousin.
@KeetPotato: [music club] what should we play today [hand goes up] yes joe? "banjo" all those who wanna ban joe raise their hand [everyones hand goes up]