@ElgatoEsmio: I TRADED MY ALARM CLOCK FOR A KOALA SO I CAN SLEEP UNTIL HE STARTS BEGGING FOR LEAVES WHICH’S LIKE 3 DAYS
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@Mothpete: The home cooked pizza box says to cook the pizza between 14 and 16 minutes. That's 15 minutes, right? I'm not reading too much into it?
@KentWGraham: If I were the person naming diseases, Chronic Lying Disorder would be called Liarrhea.
@yassinovic89: Women's logic: I went to buy a suit. But i saw a beautiful pair of shoes. So i bought this handbag.