@badteacher4u: I tried playing hide-n-seek with my friends newborn and now I'm not allowed back inside that hospital :(
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WhaJoTalkinBout: [Petco] INTERVIEWER: We're looking for a real fish person. ME: Like a mermaid? INTERVIEWER:
@shkeeber: Me: *passes ransom note* Mom: 2 bags of unmarked cookies? Me: Or you'll never see the cat alive! Mom: He's behind you. Me: STUPID KITTY!
@mrsjohngoodman: I ran over someone and now there's a bunch of flowers where it happened. It's like, I came back to apologize, not be lavished with gifts