@anbrll00: I tried saving a cat in a tree but the darn thing wouldn't accept Jesus.
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@TheMichaelRock: Don't be scared of the government shutdown, liquor stores are run by the states.
@shariv67: If movies have taught me anything, it's that the insurance for fruit vendor carts must be astronomical.
@Lisa_Laughs_: He shouldn't have died so young, but he also shouldn't have cut the grass at 7:30 am on a Sunday. (I'm writing my neighbors obituary)
@Ray_stephan: A 5 year old asked me what marriage is like. So I gave him a chocolate bar and told him not to eat it.