@Breadery: I tried to wear skinny jeans but it squeezed all my flesh into the top half of my body and made me look like a novelty balloon.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Laser_Cat: *two turtles strapping themselves to a sleeping cheetah* Just you wait, Carl! This is gonna be awesome!
@welone1: During sex, my wife always wants to talk to me? Just the other night she called me from some hotel.
@ohheyitszara: Michael Cera and Jesse Eisenberg bump into each other, say sorry awkwardly, then try to sidestep each other but keep stepping the same way.