@crunchenhanced: I trimmed all the bushes in the front yard to make my house look bigger.
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@justabloodygame: [throwing a party] I invited Judas. That okay? "Judas from IT, or the guy who betrayed Jesu-" *loud knock* "It's the Roman legion. Open up!"
@rad_milk: im the guy responsible for throwing the chicken in the air for fried chicken commercials. i will never reveal my secret method's
@SuperRandomish: If you walk up to me with a plate of food and say "Matt?" My name will always be Matt.