@TheBoydP: I try not to be loud in the office restroom stall unless my boss is in the restroom, because then I want to prove I'm not just goofing off.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@aka_fatman: "OK...that Trust Exercise didn't go exactly according to plan. Once we dispose of the bodies let's keep quiet about this...AS A TEAM!"
@ABKool: If a tiger attacks your mother-in-law and your wife at the same time, whom would u save? Man : Off course, the tiger.. very few are left
@david8hughes: [donating blood] Nurse: you're looking faint. Can I get you a drink? Me: no thanks, I've just had like 60 of those strawberry Capri Suns
@PaperWash: Last minute gift idea: Give someone a bucket of water and tell them your sorry their ice sculpture melted