@Underchilde: I tweet because it’s fun and I like the validation, but also because one day it’ll prove to a jury how crazy I am.
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@DanielJHannan: Babies are very like governments, you know. Constant appetite at one end, constant mess at the other. And they only ever get bigger.
@thatdutchperson: Cashier: what's with all the pineapple juice? Me: *winks* -Spends the night making delicious umbrella drinks with my cat.
@NateMorrising: He stole my heart, so I stole his last name. Is the slogan of a very famous body parts and new ID shop in Mexico.
@Ristolable: A guy I know just posted "I'm relaxing today, don't bother me" on Facebook, and let me tell you: I was going to bother him but now I'm not