@livingnBoston: I updated my drivers on my laptop and now I have all kinds of pop ups...thanks Microsoft!
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@Headkutter: How to scare burglars off.... First put pictures on the wall of you with a tiger. Second put a cat litter box in your hall and shit in it.
@Terdoh: Me: And what do you do if I tell you I'm having a heart attack? Siri: I clear your browser history. Me: That's right darling.
@SondraDeeMe: Boyfriend's on the phone talking to a guy about lattes and his love of peach scones. I'm on the couch wondering when our periods synced.
@SwanieChicken: Is it still a walk of shame if I'm leaving my own house? It ain't like I'm proud of what happened in there.