@ryan_rachryan80: I use so many age defying crinkle creams that I don't have finger prints anymore.
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@moooooog35: Wife [walking into house]: Ummm.. Me: [recreating "You Better Shape Up Scene" from Grease with my dog dressed as Sandy]: You're home early.
@MikeCanRant: There is no law that says you can't smoke celery inside public places. What are they gonna do? Ask you to extinguish your celery? Doubtful.