@JamesonN7: I used to have poor judgement before Twitter, now I have poorer judgment
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@AlanFelyk: Saw a woman on a dating site who says she’s looking for God. I’m thinking she’s not His type.
@__MICHAELJ0RDAN: Its like they say, don't judge a apple by its color because it might be a orange.
@ImaFlyontheWall: Bob: Who is that? Me:That's Ted, he's the opposite of a hypochondriac.. Ted's arm falls off Ted: Hey guys! Bob: Holy shit! Ted: What, I'm ok