@Elizasoul80: I walk around in public saying "wait for me guys" so everyone thinks I have friends.
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@Smiilze: I hear you knocking at my door. You thinking I'm going to answer it is your second mistake.
@NervousJr: "I can't wait until this one orange erases years of poor eating choices." -me, dieting
@lawking30: Making NSA work hard today: just left vm for Senator saying, "drop-off done" & then made a hair appointment at a salon in Lahore, Pakistan.
@avxlanche: me: mom i like this person from twitter mom: TWITTER IS LIKE CRAIGSLIST YOU THINK YOURE BUYING USED BOWLING SHOES AND YOU WIND UP DEAD