@TheToxicWaster: I walked a girl down into the dark woods. She said it's very scary. I said how do you think i feel i have to walk back alone..
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@samalmightysam: That awkward moment when a person says they need their beauty sleep when what they really need is plastic surgery.
@Home_Halfway: DATE: Are you a dog person or a cat person? ME: *gets really close to the date & whispers* I'm just a person, what bullshit question is this