@AsYouNotWish: I want 2 kids just in case the first one doesn't get enough likes on Instagram.
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@BCMontgo: What's the issue officer? Officer: You have no idea why I pulled you over? I have some ideas, but would like to hear your opinion first.
@Mr_Kapowski: Me: *reclines* Nice Wife: I still can't believe you bought a used gynecological exam table Me: I can see the tv perfectly between my legs
@goldengateblond: Wait til the people so excited about all-day breakfast at McDonald's find out they can make breakfast at home whenever they want.