@bleustreak: I want a polka band at my funeral. I'm the one who's dead, let 'em suffer.
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@ChickenFrecklez: Hubby's head seems like it's almost twice the size of mine. We are never having children.
@mashyboo: be careful if you wear the same clothes everyday you'll turn into a cartoon character
@EndhooS: [Commercial for babies] *100 year old woman trying to feed a brick a bottle of milk* "There's got to be a better way"
@ArfMeasures: WIFE [in labour] GOD MAKE IT STOP MIDWIFE: The baby's WIFE: NO, THE NOISE ME [stops playing pan pipes] Is the nurse being too loud, love?