@pakalupapito: i want all the extra fat on my body to fall off and turn into $65,000 cash
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@PortRooster: If women had to be assembled, a lot of us would probably just play with the box...
@hardlyrelevant: Me: (from the back of the ambulance) CHANGE THE RADIO Medic: Sir you need to conserve your strength Me: I AM NOT DYING TO A COLDPLAY SONG
@Mr_Kapowski: Me: Hurry up kid. We're gonna be late for school 6 y/o daughter: *begins eating each Lucky Charms marshmallow individually*