@TheAdly: I want to apologize for the awful true things I said when I was angry.
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@SatansTongue: *el chapo dies* God: okay I'm gonna have to send you to hell Chapo: ok *3 weeks later* Angel: El Chapo has escaped from hell
@LostCatDog: This doctor once told me eating a bagel was like eating 5 slices of bread and I was like ok, cool, I like bread
@ohwrigley: Mommy? Does Barbie come with Ken? No dear, she comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken.
@AthenaMystique: *sings Batman theme *crawls along bars of death *rolls down slope *ascends tower *knocks out foes "Miss, you need to leave the playground."