@joe_binkley: I want to be a server at a restaurant that serves fish jelly, just so when people order it, I can say "I don't think you're ready."
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@EffdotEss: When you pick a name for your kid, type it in Microsoft Word first. If the red squiggly line shows up, please reconsider.
@iwearaonesie: *sneaks into sons room to scare him* *trips over skateboard* *steps on something squishy* *turns light on* *makes him clean his room*
@Weird_Rash: Just got arrested for racing my Segway wearing an adult diaper and a Viking helmet. Still not clear which law I broke.