@truegritrumble: Well there goes my Wednesday night.

@desi_princess: Why is it whenever we see a police car, we drive like we have 10 kilos of cocaine and a stolen baby in the car?

@Gupton68: Having watched me rewire a plug, the kids are looking at me with a renewed sense of wonder. I think they’re mostly wondering how I managed to make the whole house explode like that.

@TheThryll: Kind of sad that the most fragile men in the world are required by law to become pro wrestling referees.

@torrami: A baby came out of my stomach and I was all "weird, I don't remember eating that..."