@SamGrittner: I want to become a librarian so bad. I love books but I love telling people to shut up even more.
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@tricycle_champ: [walking away from taco truck] WIFE: whats wrong ME: nothing WIFE: did u think the truck would be one giant taco ME: *wiping away tears* no
@Try2StopME: Hockey is more enjoyable if you pretend they're fighting over the world's last Oreo.
@ch000ch: [drops a pinch of fish food into fish tank] ME: here ya go little buddies FISH: oh wow pukey shit flakes again, thanks man