@dankashane20: I want to get a medical bracelet that says, "Shy" so I can I just hold it up during social situations.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@FeelParmesan: *On a first date. Her: I'm just tired of all the games Me: *slowly slides the deck of UNO cards back in my coat pocket
@Sickayduh: DAD: I want a steak. HER: Eat this chicken instead. It's healthy. DAD: No it isn't. It's dead.
@TravLeBlanc: I predict that Obama's next move is to threaten to hold his breath until Russia leaves the Crimea.
@hell_doe: roses are red, violets are blue *arnold schwarzenegger voice* tell me who is your daddy and what does he do