@robo_junkie: I want to get arrested by a motorcycle cop just so I can hold him tenderly around the waist on my way to jail.
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@AndyAsAdjective: "Rapunzel! Let down your hair!" RAPUNZEL: Hey hair, ya wanna go get ice cream? HAIR: Yeah! RAPUNZEL: Well too bad. Because we're not.
@kidphonic: I keep hearing about kids accidentally dying from trying to get an asphyxiation high. What happened to drugs, kids?! We still have drugs!
@decentbirthday: Me: did you know that abbreviating names can be really confusing? GF: really? Me: yeah George Foreman: that's interesting