@shutupmikeginn: I want to put a 'Honk If You Love Jesus' bumpersticker on a goose
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@djdarrellripley: Her: My father is very upset that I'm your girlfriend. Me: Well, duh, I'm very upset that you're my girlfriend...
@2tickytacky: OMG. My wife's boyfriend made such a fuss when I told his parents at dinner about how noisy those two are in bed.
@blood_orphan: 3rd eye: youre on drugs 4th eye: youre a nerd 5th-7th eyes: ??? 8th eye: you are now a spider 9th eye: spider on drugs 16th eye: nerd spider
@marinhubka: “How about… we change the 6 to a 7?" "I love it!" --board meeting at the company that makes novelty sunglasses for New Year's Eve