@carlielyn: I wanted to lose 10 pounds this year. Only 13 to go.
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@brianbowman73: I give new meaning to the word "awesome." At least I did when I changed the Wikipedia entry.
@msdanifernandez: Game Show Host: if you were stranded on an island with no people, what-- Me: omg yes
@ericsshadow: FBI: If you testify you'll have to go into the Witness Protection Program ME: I'll do it FBI: Your wife and kids too ME: Oh ok never mind