@mstern68: I was a fantastic parent right up until I had kids of my own.
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@daplusk: Next time you order coffee at Starbucks tell them your name is Bueller and then leave the store.
@summerofbenny: I avoid being photographed at events held at my apartment complex. I don't need someone pointing to a picture and saying,"That's him."
@causticbob: I was kicked out of a strip club last night for throwing twenty quid at one of the strippers. Ok, I admit it was in pound coins.