@Coastiefish: I was a pizza delivery guy once, but only for a day. They gave me 12 pizzas to deliver and I just never came back.
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@Nikkeya08: Me: If you take them out of their natural habitat they seek revenge by burning your tounge Sis: M: S: That's a pizza roll. You're high
@AndrewNadeau0: Just realized I haven't fed my imaginary friends since a tea party when I was 6 so they're all dead now.
@GrantTanaka: As I waved my gun in their faces, I thought to myself "What kinda weird bank has children, clowns, presents, & balloons all over the place?"
@batkaren: HER: What's your cell plan? ME: Bodily decay over decades until inevitable mortal collapse. You? HER: ... ME: ... HER: ... V-Verizon.